For the last probably ten days in a row, i've been either drunk or high, and on this eleventh night i'm kind of feeling like I have somethings to say. Maybe my brain is feeling the lack of drugs and is attempting to compensate, so be it. lol. I can't really explain what i've been feeling tonight, but i'm certainly going to try. Everything seems so...idk...planned out. Graduate, go to college, graduate, go back to school again, graduate, get a shitty apartment, work shitty jobs that you hate, and then finally settle into a job that you don't even mildly love where you will presumably remain for the rest of your life if you're lucky. i dont want that! in fact, i refuse it! my parents come home miserable day after day telling me to stay in school so i can get what i want, but why should i when its going to lead me down the same path as them? does my future lie outside standardized education? more and more every day my heart seems to tell me that the answer is yes. I want to travel, and share what I have to say and listen to what the world has to offer. College almost seems like a crutch when i view it like this. It's crippling us from experiencing what life is really like, which is why alot of people burn out when they graduate and end up either suicidal or somebody's bitch. Two things I will not be. Every day I get closer o my summer class and I ask myself whats the point? Fighting it would be bliss, but is it worth my parents believing i'm heading down a path of self destruction? who knows?
-sorry for the wierdness, but I got in this huge debate with my dad tonight how I refuse to settle in a job and blah blah so it sort of led to this. lol
and is it mean for me to tell a friend to shut up about her ex? I mean, i know break-up's suck, but every time we hang out, it's all she wants to talk about. And its not like new info, its the same shit reiterated again and again. I feel like a bad friend, but I can't take it!
and i miss st. rose. living at home sucks.
Love,
Marissa
i think you should tell your friend that she should move on in her life and forget about her ex because it will only hold her back from finding someone else and not annoying her friends. You do have to tell her you don't want to listen to her complain, tell her to live life to the fullest because its too short to complain and worry about the past and future. Live in the present!
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